All of You Read online

  I smile and clutched my stomach. “I wonder if Tabitha ate all the waffles.”

  “Would you like to go to brunch?”

  “With you?” I asked, surprised.

  Lincoln smiled, “Of course with me.”

  “Oh, I don’t know if that’s a good idea,” I said shyly.

  “Why not? You’re hungry. Is there anywhere good to eat around here?”

  I was trying to trust Lincoln, but I wanted to take things slow. “I should probably just go home,” I said quietly.

  Lincoln looked over at me, but I turned away and looked out the side window. I didn’t want him to see my emotions right now. He sighed. “I have a game tomorrow night in Denver. Can I see you when I get back?” He reached out and clasped my hand. I looked up and gave him a small smile.

  “What do you want to do?” I asked, tilting my head.

  “Are you busy this weekend?”

  I shrugged. “I have dinner plans Sunday evening, but I’m free otherwise.”

  “Hmm… can I call you Saturday morning?” He sounded so hopeful.

  I bit my lip and nodded. Lincoln smiled brightly and we exchanged numbers and for the first time in a long time I felt hopeful. “Thank you, Jillian. Thank you for this morning. And thank your sister and Tabby for me for the waffles.”

  “I will.” I didn’t know what else to say. Lincoln was staring at me attentively, and as I met his gaze I realized I wanted him to kiss me again. I inhaled deeply, and Lincoln leaned slightly toward me. I closed my eyes and tried to compose myself. I didn’t want to lead him on. We could only be friends.

  “Good-bye, Lincoln. Good luck at your game.” I felt his fingertips on my cheek again and I opened my eyes and looked up at him.

  “Not good-bye, Jillian. I’ll see you later,” he said tenderly. I nodded and got out of the vehicle. I knew he was watching me walk into the house but I didn’t want to look back.

  I walked into the house and was immediately bombarded with questions from Rebecca. But before I could escape her, my phone chimed. It was Lincoln, thanking me for a nice morning.

  I peeked out the front window and saw he was still sitting in his vehicle in front of our house. I smirked to myself.

  “Who is this?” I typed in reply.

  “It’s Lincoln. Please let this be Jillian.” he texted back.

  “Sorry, dude. Name’s Harry. Think U got fake numbered, man. lol” I sent the joke and giggled, imagining Lincoln’s reaction. I couldn’t help but tease him, but the longer it took for him to reply back the less funny my text seemed. I ran to the front door and opened it only to find Lincoln standing on my steps holding his phone out.

  “Jillian. I thought—I thought we had a good morning. I—ahem—I just wanted to tell you I won’t bother you again,” he said in sad voice with a touch of anger. He turned to leave.

  “Lincoln, wait!” I called after him. “Look!” I held my phone out to him. “It was a joke. I was—I was trying to be funny.”

  Lincoln looked down at my phone with confusion. He took it and ran his thumb down the screen and I saw relief in his eyes.

  “I’m sorry, Lincoln.”

  Lincoln looked back at me and took a deep breath and gave me a small smile. I felt terrible that I had made him worry and doubt himself. I didn’t know what else to do, so I threw my arms around him and gave him a big hug. “I’m sorry,” I said again. “I guess it wasn’t funny.”

  He wrapped his arms around me and hugged me tightly, and I could feel him inhale deeply against my hair. “Well, if you promise to hug me like this every time, feel free to do it again,” Lincoln said with a laugh, not letting go of me. I laughed nervously and stepped away from Lincoln. He laughed again and caressed my cheek with his hand. “See ya later, Jillian,” Lincoln said with a smile. I smiled back, shook my head, and went inside.

  “Brat.” My phone chirped as I saw the text from Lincoln.

  “No more hugs for you.” I replied with a smile.

  “Now you really are a brat.”

  “Go away. I want to eat my waffle.” I typed, wanting anything except for him to go away. I tried to hide the excitement on my face.

  “Fine. Eat. Text u later?” Lincoln replied. I sent a smiley face in return and went into the kitchen preparing for Rebecca’s inquisition.

  “All right—tell me everything!” she demanded.

  “Fine,” I said with a sigh. “But I demand a waffle.” My sister nodded and started preparing food as I told her about my morning.

  Chapter Six

  I spent the rest of New Year’s Day at home with Rebecca and Tabitha, enjoying the day off from work and school. We did chores around the house and ended the evening playing several hands of Go Fish with Tabitha. As Rebecca started Tabitha’s bedtime routine, I got out my laptop with the intent of working on some overdue research I needed for my project but found myself unable to concentrate on any of it. Inevitably my attention was drawn to thoughts of Lincoln, and I realized how little I actually knew about him, considering his notoriety. But I thought that was maybe one of the things he liked about me. He could talk about himself, and I didn’t already know all his facts and details.

  I looked at my phone and brought up his texts. I smiled as I thought about how sad he looked when he thought I had given him a fake number and then, once again, replayed our conversation over in my head, wondering what he was doing right now. He said he had a game in Denver tomorrow. Did that mean he left for Denver tonight or would he fly out tomorrow? How long did he practice before a game? Would he fly back tomorrow night or Saturday morning?

  I considered texting him and asking, but a little worry in the back of my mind told me he would be annoyed if I bothered him. I opened an Internet browser on my laptop and navigated to Wikipedia. I told myself I was just going to look up the game of hockey to learn more about it, but a half hour later I found myself on Lincoln’s wiki page, reading his biography. I was reading about his college stats when a voice behind me surprised me.

  “You know, if you want to know more about him, maybe you should just ask him,” Rebecca said.

  I snapped my laptop shut, and my cheeks turned red at being caught searching for more information on Lincoln. “I was just researching,” I lied.

  “Mm-hmm. He gave you his number. He would probably appreciate it more if you asked him instead of googling him,” she said knowingly.

  “Tabby asleep?” I asked, changing the subject.

  “Yeah. She was lights-out right away. I don’t think she got much sleep last night.”

  “That’s okay though. She’s young. Unlike you. What time did you get in last night?” I asked her pointedly.

  “Not too late. Bars were still open when I left,” she said with a shrug.

  “Did you have fun?” Rebecca didn’t get out a lot between working and taking care of her daughter.

  “Yeah. It was great to see everyone.”

  “You know, if you want to go out more, you can. I can stay home with Tabby Cat. You should get out and meet someone. Find a guy,” I said, and she snorted.

  “Yeah, I’ll get right on that,” she said sarcastically but then turned serious. “I know you love Tabitha, but you know she’s my responsibility, not yours. I’m the one who should be sacrificing for her, not you.”

  I looked down with uncertainty. “I thought you liked having me here.”

  “Oh, stop it, Jillian. You know we do. Tabby and I would be lost without you, and I never want you to leave. But you should have a life.”

  “You know why I stay home, Becca. I don’t have anyone to go out with me,” I said quietly.

  “You are selling yourself short again, Jilly. I really think you need to give Lincoln a chance.”

  “I just met the man, Bec,” I said, rolling my eyes. “Plus how do you know he’s trustworthy?” My old fears crept back.

  “I don’t,” she admitted. “The only way to know if he’s trustworthy is for you to give him a chance. Can’t hurt to text him.” Reb
ecca patted my arm, trying to encourage me.

  “What if I annoy him?”

  “Don’t doubt yourself, Jilly. There is nothing about you that is annoying.” She stood up. “All right, I’m going to be an old lady and go to bed early. I wasn’t kidding when I said I was hungover this morning. You’re off tomorrow, right?”

  “Yeah. You’re working eight to five?” I double-checked even though I already knew I was watching Tabitha tomorrow.

  “Yep. All right. I’m off to bed,” Rebecca said while walking away but then stopped and turned back. “You really should text him.”

  “Good-night, Rebecca!” I cried with a roll of my eyes, and I heard Rebecca giggle as she walked away.

  I opened my laptop back up and stared at the picture of Lincoln in the right-hand corner of the screen that accompanied his biography. I bit my lip nervously and swiped my thumb over my phone. I could still text him. It wasn’t that late in the evening. I read over our texts again for the hundredth time and debated what to do. In the end, my old fears and doubt overwhelmed me, and I went to bed without texting him. Even though I had told him I just wanted friendship, I feared rejection, and I figured if he wanted to text me, he would have. I would wait to see what happened on Saturday.

  ~~~~~~~~

  I woke up late the next morning and gasped with happiness when I looked at my phone. I had a text message from Lincoln.

  “Good morning, beautiful. How was your night?”

  I looked at the time and saw he had sent the text twenty minutes ago. I was surprised Tabitha wasn’t awake yet. But then again, she hadn’t gotten any sleep the night before.

  “Do you know that’s a country song?” I asked in reply.

  “I did indeed know that. Do you like country?” Lincoln’s answer came instantaneously.

  “Some of it. I like just about everything. Except rap.”

  “Me too. Did you sleep okay? What are you up to today?” he asked.

  “Watching Tabby. Not sure what she wants to do today. And yes I slept okay. You?” I hated my reply. It sounded too stiff. But my phone chimed back immediately.

  “I slept great. I dreamt of you.” Lincoln replied.

  I laughed. “Liar. You did not. lol”

  “LOL, okay you got me. But I did wake up thinking about you.”

  I bit my lip. I wanted to tell him I went to bed thinking of him, but I didn’t want to encourage him. We could only be friends. I sent a smiley face in reply and then asked him about his plans for the day as I got out of bed and made my way to the kitchen for coffee and breakfast.

  “Flight leaves in a couple of hours. Then ice time for practice and game’s at seven.”

  “Are you excited for the game?” I wondered. Maybe it was all ho-hum for him by this point. He had been playing his whole life.

  “Will you be watching?” Lincoln replied without answering my question.

  “I can…,” I answered.

  “Then yes, I’m excited to play, hoping you’ll be watching me.”

  “Mommy?” Tabitha called out as she walked into the kitchen. Her nightgown with rainbows on it was wrinkled, and she was rubbing her eyes. Her hair was messed up in all directions.

  “Just me today, kiddo. Mommy’s at work,” I told her. “What do you want for breakfast?”

  “Waffles!” Tabitha said with too much enthusiasm for this time of the morning.

  “You just had waffles yesterday, Tabby Cat,” I reminded her.

  “But I want them again,” Tabitha said stubbornly.

  “Okay, I’ll make you waffles but you have to eat some fruit too,” I conceded and then heard my phone chime.

  “Hello?” Lincoln texted. He must be wondering why I hadn’t replied.

  “Sorry, didn’t mean to ignore you. Tabby just woke up and is demanding waffles.”

  “Ah. I was worried I scared you off again. Didn’t mean to sound needy. Tell Tabby hi from me.” Lincoln replied quickly. I tried to squash the feelings of joy that came with the idea that he needed me.

  “Will do. Have a great game. I’ll be watching. :)”

  “Okay if I text you after the game?”

  “Yeah that’s fine. :)”

  I put my phone down with a smile and focused on the waffles. “What do you say to ice skating today, Tabby Cat?” I asked.

  “Ooh yes! I can try my twirls again!” Tabitha said excitedly and began collecting the ingredients for waffles. I smiled at her involuntarily. There was absolutely nothing about this child that I didn’t love. I was excited to take her skating, but I was suddenly looking forward to tonight and a certain hockey game.

  After breakfast, Tabitha and I cleaned up and got ready for a day outside on the ice. I bundled myself and Tabitha up in our warmest clothes, grabbed our skates, and drove down to the same pond Lincoln and I had been to yesterday. It was crowded again today since kids were still out of school for the holiday, but most of the people were there to play hockey.

  We found a quieter spot away from the makeshift rink, and Tabitha spent the day practicing spinning and attempting tricks. I pulled out my phone and took pictures and video to show Rebecca. I found a random stranger to take a picture of Tabitha and me skating together and decided to send it to Lincoln.

  “You’re not the only one who’s good on the ice. :)” I sent along with the picture. I looked at the time and estimated he had probably just gotten to Denver. I figured he was busy, so I put my phone away without waiting for a reply and went back to skating with Tabitha.

  It was only hours later when we had gotten too cold and had given up for the day and were back in my car warming up that I checked my phone and saw the text.

  “You look way better on skates than I do. Someday I’ll have to see this in person. For now, stay warm.” Lincoln had replied to me, and my face broke out in a smile. I couldn’t help but feel giddy, even if he was just a friend.

  “What are you looking at, Aunt Jilly?” Tabitha said, breaking my fixation.

  “A text from Lincoln. Remember him from yesterday?”

  “Yeah. He ate waffles with me. Can we have waffles for supper, Aunt Jilly?”

  This child was obsessed with waffles! “No, Tabby Cat. You had waffles for breakfast.”

  “So?” she said sweetly.

  “So I can make something other than waffles. Or we can stop and get burgers to go and take them home.”

  “Can we watch a movie tonight?” she asked.

  “Not tonight, Tabby Cat. We’re watching a hockey game on TV tonight.”

  “That sounds boooooring.”

  I had to giggle at Tabitha’s reaction. “Well, you don’t have to watch it. You can do whatever you want in the house. But I’m watching hockey.”

  “Fiiiiiine,” Tabitha whined and ended the conversation.

  Later that day after we had stopped for food, I flipped to the cable guide and found the time slot for Lincoln’s game and set the DVR to record. I had a half hour before the game started, so Tabitha and I sat at the kitchen island and were eating ice cream when Rebecca got home.

  “Mommy! We saved you a burger and fries!” Tabitha announced after she hugged her mother hello.

  “Burgers and fries, Jillian?” Rebecca said disapproving of my unhealthy dinner choice for her daughter.

  “Hey, it’s better than the waffles she wanted to have. AGAIN,” I said, defending myself.

  “What did you do today, Tabby Cat?” Rebecca asked her daughter. Tabitha told her mother about the ice-skating and showed Rebecca the picture and video on my phone.

  “And tonight we have to watch a hockey game,” Tabitha said in a disgruntled tone.

  “Ooh really??” she asked, looking at me and smiling knowingly.

  “He asked me if I was going to watch—” I started to say.

  “You talk to him?” Rebecca interrupted.

  I shrugged, trying to appear nonchalant. “He texted me,” I said.

  Rebecca was still holding my phone from looking at the pictures, and s
he immediately brought up my text messages and read through my conversation with Lincoln.

  “This is good stuff. I think he really likes you,” she said, causing me to sigh.

  “Who likes her?” Tabitha asked.

  “Nobody,” I said. “Go find something else to do if you’re done with your ice cream and don’t want to watch hockey.”

  Tabitha scooted out of the room quickly, and I went into the living room to watch the game with Rebecca following behind me, still munching on her food.

  ~~~~~~~~

  “GOOOOOOAL!!!!!” The announcer screamed at me through the television. “And with that goal, time runs out! Denver wins over Chicago 2-1!”

  I groaned internally and flopped back on the couch. That sucked. Lincoln and his teammates had played well, as far as I could tell, but they just couldn’t edge out over Denver. I wondered if Lincoln was thinking about me watching the game and seeing them lose. I wondered what his mood would be like and if he would still text me later like he said he would. I tried to imagine how I would feel if that had been me that had just lost the game. Maybe Lincoln was used to the highs and lows of his profession, but I assumed he would be majorly pissed off at the loss. To lose something he had worked so hard at had to be tough, even if it was just one game out of many. I wanted to text him and tell him something that would make him feel better, but I didn’t know what. I thought about it for a minute and laughed to myself. I pulled out my phone and took a selfie while making a sad duck face with pouty lips and crossed eyes. I attached the picture to a text message and sent it to him with the words “Sorry for the loss.” I hoped he would find it funny and it would cheer him up.

  Rebecca had put Tabitha to bed halfway through the game and then retired herself shortly afterward. I debated if I should stay up or go to bed as well. Lincoln said he would text me after the game, but maybe he was in no mood for conversation with me. He was probably exhausted from the game, but the longer it took for him to reply, the more I began to panic. Maybe he took the loss über seriously, and my picture message had pissed him off. I looked at my text, and doubt filled my mind. I hung my forehead in my hand and mentally berated myself. I was so stupid! Why would he think that was funny? He was going to hate me for making fun of his team losing the game.